Familiar Facades
by Bahiya-Maisha
Summary: An Alternate History piece told from the point of view of Olivia teenage daughter: “You’re doing to me what your mother did to you, only without the booze.”
1. Chapter 1

**Familiar Facades **

_**Summary: An Alternate History piece told from the point of view of Olivia teenage daughter: "You're doing to me what your mother did to you, only without the booze."**_

_**Author notes: This is an A/H. Certain aspects of the canon characters have been greatly altered for the purpose of the storyline. If you, as the reader, do not enjoy pieces that do not reflect the current state of the canon characters, I suggest you do not continue. (Borrowed from Dr. Fresh, with permission). **_

**_Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of the characters of Law and Order SVU. Numb was written by Linkin Park and When A Woman's Fed Up was written by R-Kelly.

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**Numb: Present (2005)**

_I'm tired of being what you want me to be  
feeling so faithless  
lost under the surface  
I don't know what you're expecting of me  
put under the pressure  
of walking in your shoes  
every step that I take is another mistake to you _

"Danny," she pokes her head though the door and scans my room. The usual clothes, books, and Converses are fanned across the floor among the huge piles of class work and CDs. She shakes her head, I don't know if it's out of disgust or defeat, and pushes the door open. She says something else, I think she called me again, but I really don't feel like hearing her laundry list of demands. She knows I'm busy, I don't see _why _she felt the need to come in here. "Danny!"

"What!"

"Don't 'what' me," she says, still looking about my room. Her eyes land on my math book and the stack of black lined paper, I already know what's coming. "Your homework done?"

"Does it _look _done?"

"Do I _look _like one of your peers? You seem to forget that the only thing you run around here is your mouth, Danny, I don't have the time nor energy to put up with your teenage melodrama. Get started on your homework now, I don't want to come back in here and find it unfinished."

"Whatever," I roll over on my bed and continue the Steven King novel I can't seem to let go of. "I'm reading, I'll do it later."

"That's the problem with you," she says, stepping further into the room. "Later never comes. How do you expect to get into college with the grades you've been bringing in here? What kind of future do you want for yourself? You have so much talent, Danny, yet you waste it on the Sims and all the other crap..."

"Crap?" I jolt up and toss my book aside. She _always _has to go there. Just because I'm not into submerging myself in school work and antagonizing over my grade point average, doesn't mean the things I are pointless. "For one, Mom, my life does not revolve around a computer game and just because I'm not throwing bitch fits about college doesn't mean I don't care about going. You don't know anything about me, being that you're _never _home, so how are you going to stand there and talk to me about what I waste my time on? You're not here anyway so how would you know?"

"This may come as a shock to you, but I work for a living. You never seem to complain when you ask for new basketball shoes and boxing gloves."

"Whatever," I sigh. "Can you go now, apparently I have homework to do."

"Whatever? I'm sick of hearing that word, Danika. Whatever would be you packing your bags and you getting out of my house, that's what _whatever _would be."

"Okay, I get it, I really do."

"No it's not okay Danny," I know she wants to yell, but she doesn't. "I know I'm not always here and I wish I could be with you more often, but this is our life..."

'This is _your _life Mom, _your's,_" I don't yell, but I do have that "tone" she's sure that I constantly take with her. "I never wanted you to join that unit, even Grandma was against it, but you couldn't rest until you had the job. Dad left, Grandma died, and Alex _died _working for SVU and yet none of that seems to phase you. You never come to any of my matches or games, my teachers probably don't believe that you exist, I might as well be raising my _damn_ self."

"Wait just a second, I might not be here all the time, but I'm still your mother," she inches up to my face. I'm not that much shorter, but she's in her cop stance, I know when to throw in the towel. I gulp and step back. She sucks in a deep breath. "Look, this isn't making things better, you and I both know that. Please just start your homework while I cook dinner. I have to go back to the office at nine and I'd like to catch some sleep before I go in. I would sleep better if I knew your homework was finished."

"All right, you win," I shake my head and fall back onto my bed. I pick up my book and put my Bob Marley bookmark back on the two-hundredth page and shut it. "What are you planning on making?"

"Garlic pasta and a spinach salad with some bacon, nothing major."

"You know what? It's okay, I'll make something for myself later, you need your sleep."

"No..no...Danny...I can.."

"Mom," I laugh and hold up my hand in an effort to silence her. "It's fine, really, go hit the sack."

"You're a great kid," she kisses my forehead and runs her hand across my cheek. I smile lightly as she head out. Just as she's about to turn the knob she turns and around. "I'm really sorry that I can't be here for you all the time, I would really like to be it's just..."

"Mom, I know."

"Finish your homework."

I nod.

_I've  
become so numb  
I can't feel you there  
become so tired  
so much more aware _

When by the time my America Lit. Paper is finished and edited, she's gone. I understand, but just because you understand something doesn't mean you always have to enjoy it. When I'm finished eating I make sure all the lights are off, the doors and windows are locked, and I climb into bed with my book. It's like she's a dream, she comes unexpectedly but I experience her anyway, but when I'm ready for her she never comes. I'm numb.

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_A/N: I'm looking for a beta, feel free to e-mail me at the e-mail listed in my profile. Thanks much :)_  



	2. Chapter 2

**When A Woman's Fed Up: Past (2001)**_  
_

_I'm standing here looking in the mirror  
Saying "damn" to myself  
I should have known the day would come  
That she would find somebody else  
And all the things I took her through  
Shit, I shouldn't have lasted this long  
Now I'm at this telephone booth calling Tyrone_

"Why you by the window, what's wrong Daddy?" I ask. I see the suitcase he's stuffing with clothes. I remember the night before. "It's okay, she won't be mad when she gets back."

"I hurt her real bad Danny," he says. He hangs his head and takes in a deep breath, he rubs his huge pecan colored hands over his stubble. He won't look at me. "She's going to be mad at me for a long time."

"If you knew all that, why'd you do what you did?"

"Things haven't been great between your mother and I."

"And? Did you think cheating was going to fix it?"

"You sound like Olivia," he laughs softly.

"What, logical? Mom's pretty diplomatic, Dad, it wouldn't have killed you to talk things out with her."

"Oh yeah, I could've talked until I turned blue in the face, but Olivia can't hear me. Her head is so far up Captain Cragen ass that you can see her face through his eyes."

"That's not fair, Daddy, she can't exactly tell her boss 'no'."

"She has no problem saying it to her family."

"I know, but screwing random women and coming home drunk, doesn't strike me as the strategy to get her to change her mind."

"What have you been reading?"

"Dad I'm serious, what you did was stupid..."

"Look here, Danika, don't get beside yourself..."

"Sorry," I join him on the couch and stare out of the window too.

"I bet she's with Elliot now," he snorts bitterly. I roll my eyes.

"He's her partner Dad."

"You know what I meant."

"Eww, he's married."

"So was I."

"Was?"

"Would you stay with me if I treated you the way I've been treating her."

"Who's coming over to help you move?"

_Cuz when a woman's fed up  
(No matter how you beg, no)  
It ain't nothing you can do about it  
(Nothing you can do about it)  
It's like running out of love  
(No matter what you say, no)  
And then it's too late to talk about it  
(Too late to talk about it)_

"Olivia, we need to talk," I hear him say as soon as she walks in.

Silence.

"Olivia, come on now..."

"Felix," she's using her cop voice, defiantly not a good sign. "I'm really not in the mood for drama."

"Please, just talk to me."

"Now you want to talk? You weren't thinking about talking when you were out playing your instruments into somebody else's band..."

"Liv, don't use my sayings against me, they don't work for you."

"You use my _job_ as an excuse to sleep around, but it doesn't work for me. If you were any more full of shit, your eyes would be brown."

"Well it's not like you're hear to listen anyway."

"So what, Felix! So what, that doesn't give you the right to sleep around. Did you think about Danny and what this would do to her, huh? Did you? She's twelve years old, she needs her father around."

"Nothing's going to stop me from seeing her, Olivia."

"Oh, really?"

"Look, things haven't been right between us ever since you joined that unit. I know some of what you deal with everyday and I can't imagine what it's like to bundle that up inside of you, but pushing Danny and I away won't ebb the pain and the guilt Liv. I shouldn't have cheated, those womenwere _my _way of dealing with the loss of you."

"You didn't lose me, at least not then," I hear her sigh. I know she's running her fingers through her short, jet black, hair. "You knew I was going to be a cop when you married me, I explained countless times what that meant..."

"You explain things to Danny constantly, does she always listen"

"Are you a child?"

"Weren't you the one that said men are like children?"

"Felix..."

"I know, I know, but I thought things...you'd...change after we had Danny."

"You thought I was going to quit my job because I had a child, get your head out of the 1950s. Besides, Elliot has four children and..."

"There you go with Elliot."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Elliot this, Elliot that, I'm sick of hearing is name in this house!"

"Well it's a good thing you're moving."

"Are you fucking him?"

"Excuse me? No, as a mater of fact, I'm not. Even if I was you wouldn't have room to comment about it."

"I can't deal with you right now!"

The front door opens and then slams.

_Now the up is down  
And the silence is sound  
I hurt you too too many times  
Now I can't come around_


End file.
